Life just hasn't been easy lately. I have been blessed by so much, but choices and circumstances have left me down trodden while trying to cope. On a side note, I did see my OBGYN this week, who after discussing things with me and such, doesn't believe that I am suffering from postpartum depression. On the contrary, with all things considering, and with the circumstances that I have found myself in lately while being a mom of four with one of those being an infant, I am handling things fairly well. Life just has sort of been that crappie lately, and she believes that I have just been reacting to those events.
So with that said, and as I have mentioned in previous posts, I have had to find the positives in each day and to be thankful in all things. In the dark times, I have realized that although I feel like I am in a pit waiting for the strength and help to climb out so to speak, God hasn't forgotten me nor my family; and He has provided glimpses of that throughout the last several weeks/months.
For instance, a few weeks ago, Scot had Lasik surgery performed about an hour away from here in pretty C'ville. For various reasons, I was so excited and blessed that Scot let the boys and I drive him up there and back one weekday morning. This brightened my day that I was able to help him out in this way as his wife. The night before, we checked the weather and located some parks with in just a mile or so from the center for which Scot was going to have the procedures performed. We had a game plan with the nice weather that had been predicted. I grabbed cars and trucks for Little Man as well as some crayons and a coloring book, snacks, and more to enjoy time at the park with the boys while Scot had the procedure done.
It felt like a well thought out plan! The next morning we dropped the girls off at school and headed up the road. As we got closer and closer to our destination, however, the clouds grew all the more thicker and thicker. As we arrived in C'ville, rain began to fall from the dark, grey clouds. This was a bit of a bummer, but I was determined to do this with out complaint and make it all work out!
The boys and I dropped off Scot and proceeded to try to find a fast food restaurant that had a play set. To my dismay, however, out of the three to four fast food chains in this one general area, not one of them included a play set. My heart sank as the rain showers continued; but I decided that if I could find a shelter/pavilion at one of the parks, we could make that work regardless. After all, I did bring coloring items.
I quickly found one of the local parks. It had two picnic shelters and one included restrooms, which was a totally awesome find as I was in desperate need of some! In the rain, I gathered the boys and we first rushed into the restrooms. Finally, I thought I could catch my breath and enjoy the time with the boys, and I was happy that my third option had worked. As we finished up inside the restrooms, however, I became more and more aware of some park maintenance workers who had also decided to seek shelter from the rain. This rather displeased me some, but I still thought that we could make it work.
As the rain subsided, I sent Little Man onto the playground after secluding him inside of the van for a short time as I fed and nursed Big Mac with the men just only a few short yards from us. They were very much aware of me as I them. Little Man started to play on the playground when it began to rain again, so as the men were taking up shelter in the pavilion that I had deemed for us, but now had decided it was unfit for us, I did what any other mom trying to save what plans and expectations that she had for the day would do. I handed Little Man an umbrella and told him to enjoy, for which one elderly man proceeded to tell me that he found that to be silly on a wet playground and a wet slide. Let's just say my response to him was not that of the patient virtue kind, but one of annoyance of how others seem to take it upon themselves to judge others and making that judgment be known!
As we were there, I realized that another whole group of men had arrived to do something at the baseball field there. Let's just say I was one mom with two of her children at a park all by her lonesome with about 10+ men. I began to feel very uncomfortable with the situation and very discouraged about how all my attempts to make this a blessed time was appearing to be failing. I felt like Satin was most definitely trying to take my joy away. I began to pray right there to myself on the playground. I asked God to protect us and I asked Him if I should retreat for our safety. I even told Him that I was discouraged.
Right after I had prayed, and as I was about to give-up and call it quits, do you know what appeared up and over the hill from where we were? A police officer in his cruiser! And he remained at the top of the hill until all the men had dispersed and continued on their way, and just as I got the call that Scot was done with his Lasik surgery! What a blessing and an answer to prayer! God showed me that He was watching everything, and that He was in control. He wanted me to see His goodness in that way that day. And my eyes were at a point of seeing it and taking note. Perfect timing! Little did that officer know that he was used as a tool more ways than just one that day. God kept me and the boys safe as He showed us one of His many blessings!
Keep your eyes open to see God's goodness!
God is good y'all!!!!!!
This is merely a place of self-reflection for me. After recent events in my life, I have learned that although some doors of life open that we may prefer stay closed nice and tight while others close that we prefer stay wide open, God is there every step of the way and He can use anything for His glory and blessing!
Thursday, May 9, 2013
Friday, April 19, 2013
An Invitation To Have A Different Perspective
So one of my sisters is pregnant, and she is pregnant with my first nephew that I will refer to on here as Peanut! Anyways, this will be the very first baby shower that I will have ever thrown for anyone, and I have been excited about it! I have been so excited to plan it; however, the first bit of planning didn't quite go as planned, and then I realized how I needed to redirect things in my heart.
When I heard of my sister's pregnancy, right away I thought about her baby shower. My other sisters wanted to chip in with the planning too; but for various reasons, it was sort of agreed upon and/or understood that I would do the majority of the planning, well at least in the beginning anyways. With my sister's guest list, I realized my little house just wasn't going to do for such an event. I knew I was going to have to plan to find a location to use and rent.
I had Big Mac's baptism to plan and coordinate, as well as I had a few other things going on, so I do have to admit that I perhaps didn't start the hunt for a location, during the height of wedding season, for which I had completely forgotten about, as early as may be I should have. However, I still started the hunt relatively early. Well, after two weeks of calling and emailing various places, I realized that my hunt for a location was not going so well. Every place, rec center, winery, reception hall, restaurant that I called were booked. I did find one location available, but lets just say it wasn't in the best area of town and it did not seem suitable for a baby shower. Felt horrible at the fact that I may have screwed up. I started to worry about how this baby shower was going to come together. Sadly, I began to stress out about what I thought would be so much fun to plan. Luckily, God had plans and I had to trust that the perfect location would pop up, and as soon as another location informed me that they were booked, my church called to let me know that our Fellowship Hall was available, for which I totally jumped on!
So with the location chosen it, was time to work on invites. Let's just say that shopping around for baby invitations was a little frustrating as I found many of the baby shower themes out there tacky, or I felt that they were totally not my sister! But finally, I found an invitation that I loved for which inspired the theme and decor!
Phew! Now it was time to work on the invitations and mail them out. Little did I know what a task that would become for me. The week that I needed to get the invitations out was the week poor Big Mac came down with a nasty cold virus and was more needy and whiny than usual. He also slept very poorly that week. And when I type poorly, I mean poorly! I mean bad! For example, one night the poor guy was awake crying, coughing and being all kinds of congested from 10:30 PM to 5:15 AM. No joke! So I was very sleep deprived to say the least, which also made working on invitations difficult. I could only work on a little bit here and there when Big Mac and life would let me! Also, when I sat down to write out the invites, the pens I had planned to use didn't work! Not even the new one! I had to make a dash to the store to get new ones, which ended up to be a good thing because in the end, I liked the new ink color better! Then there was a problem with the stamps. Scot had ordered me nice, pretty stamps from the post office to use. They were only supposed to take 2 business days to arrive from the post office delivered by the post office. They didn't arrive in a timely fashion. After a few days went by, I was forced to go to a local branch to get new stamps and I had to put stamps on about 26 or so invitations in the van with all four of my kiddos waiting so that I could mail them all at the post office since they were not being mailed in what I believed, was a timely manner.
I had found myself becoming more and more frustrated about how everything was going as I was trying to plan the baby shower. I got irritated with things, such as the post office who finally delivered the stamps 3 days late! Anyways, I started to make the shower about me and my problems by thinking things like Will everyone like the location? Will they wish I sent the invites out earlier? Will S like her shower? Will I disappoint anyone? Is this how the whole planning will go?
Finally, something popped in my head as I felt discouraged and worried about the shower. And I am not even sure that it would have even popped into my head if it wasn't for the fact that just a week or two prior God reminded me how I needed to find the positives and to thank Him in everything. Yep, I stopped and did something I hadn't done yet, and it changed my whole perspective, for which joy and excitement returned. I started to thank God for my sister, her baby and her husband. I prayed for the pregnancy. I thanked Him for the opportunity that I had to plan a shower for such special people and for such a precious reason. And with that my whole perspective changed. The baby shower planning wasn't about me anymore; but it was back where it was supposed to have been the whole time--my sister, Peanut, and her husband. God is good ya'll!
When I heard of my sister's pregnancy, right away I thought about her baby shower. My other sisters wanted to chip in with the planning too; but for various reasons, it was sort of agreed upon and/or understood that I would do the majority of the planning, well at least in the beginning anyways. With my sister's guest list, I realized my little house just wasn't going to do for such an event. I knew I was going to have to plan to find a location to use and rent.
I had Big Mac's baptism to plan and coordinate, as well as I had a few other things going on, so I do have to admit that I perhaps didn't start the hunt for a location, during the height of wedding season, for which I had completely forgotten about, as early as may be I should have. However, I still started the hunt relatively early. Well, after two weeks of calling and emailing various places, I realized that my hunt for a location was not going so well. Every place, rec center, winery, reception hall, restaurant that I called were booked. I did find one location available, but lets just say it wasn't in the best area of town and it did not seem suitable for a baby shower. Felt horrible at the fact that I may have screwed up. I started to worry about how this baby shower was going to come together. Sadly, I began to stress out about what I thought would be so much fun to plan. Luckily, God had plans and I had to trust that the perfect location would pop up, and as soon as another location informed me that they were booked, my church called to let me know that our Fellowship Hall was available, for which I totally jumped on!
So with the location chosen it, was time to work on invites. Let's just say that shopping around for baby invitations was a little frustrating as I found many of the baby shower themes out there tacky, or I felt that they were totally not my sister! But finally, I found an invitation that I loved for which inspired the theme and decor!
Phew! Now it was time to work on the invitations and mail them out. Little did I know what a task that would become for me. The week that I needed to get the invitations out was the week poor Big Mac came down with a nasty cold virus and was more needy and whiny than usual. He also slept very poorly that week. And when I type poorly, I mean poorly! I mean bad! For example, one night the poor guy was awake crying, coughing and being all kinds of congested from 10:30 PM to 5:15 AM. No joke! So I was very sleep deprived to say the least, which also made working on invitations difficult. I could only work on a little bit here and there when Big Mac and life would let me! Also, when I sat down to write out the invites, the pens I had planned to use didn't work! Not even the new one! I had to make a dash to the store to get new ones, which ended up to be a good thing because in the end, I liked the new ink color better! Then there was a problem with the stamps. Scot had ordered me nice, pretty stamps from the post office to use. They were only supposed to take 2 business days to arrive from the post office delivered by the post office. They didn't arrive in a timely fashion. After a few days went by, I was forced to go to a local branch to get new stamps and I had to put stamps on about 26 or so invitations in the van with all four of my kiddos waiting so that I could mail them all at the post office since they were not being mailed in what I believed, was a timely manner.
I had found myself becoming more and more frustrated about how everything was going as I was trying to plan the baby shower. I got irritated with things, such as the post office who finally delivered the stamps 3 days late! Anyways, I started to make the shower about me and my problems by thinking things like Will everyone like the location? Will they wish I sent the invites out earlier? Will S like her shower? Will I disappoint anyone? Is this how the whole planning will go?
Finally, something popped in my head as I felt discouraged and worried about the shower. And I am not even sure that it would have even popped into my head if it wasn't for the fact that just a week or two prior God reminded me how I needed to find the positives and to thank Him in everything. Yep, I stopped and did something I hadn't done yet, and it changed my whole perspective, for which joy and excitement returned. I started to thank God for my sister, her baby and her husband. I prayed for the pregnancy. I thanked Him for the opportunity that I had to plan a shower for such special people and for such a precious reason. And with that my whole perspective changed. The baby shower planning wasn't about me anymore; but it was back where it was supposed to have been the whole time--my sister, Peanut, and her husband. God is good ya'll!
Thursday, March 28, 2013
A Thankful Heart (In ALL Things)
It didn't even dawn on me until last week that I may have been battling with some postpartum depression the last few weeks. It only occurred to me after my friend and hairstylist, A, along with my sister, chimed in together and mentioned it. The two of them almost chimed in together at the same time that they believed that what I have been experiencing lately, could be due to some postpartum depression. It surprised me that I had not come to that realization myself. I have always fought a little bout of it after each pregnancy; however, it never became too bad and it wasn't to the degree that I have had this go round. I think I had a few things that set things in motion for a harder go at it this time round too though.
After all my previous pregnancies, you could find me crying while sitting in front of the television after hearing about a baby/child in some of kind of crisis. And I mean, I would weep over the children. I have always been empathetic and sensitive about how others are feeling through out my whole life; however, during the postpartum times in my life, they are heightened to the 10th degree just about. Scot helped me realize that the news and other such shows I should stay away from especially after just having a baby; and that has helped a great deal, but this time however, simply avoiding the news didn't help me for various reasons.
First, I was dealing with some of the hardest relationship issues that I have ever had to deal with to date. I was fearing of losing a relationship that was near and dear to me, while knowing at some point that another relationship had to go (for which that relationship recently did fall apart and almost exactly the way I thought that it would). During the highest point of turmoil and stress, I ended up losing about 15 pounds in just a matter of days. I think my body is still trying to adjust to that rapid and unexpected weight loss while nursing my infant. I was almost at an utter loss in the whole situation.
I do believe that the Sandy Hook tragedy was perhaps one of the largest catalyst for me and postpartum. I do admit that I did briefly have the news on that afternoon when the news broke of the heart-breaking tragedy. I had two bites of my lunch and could not eat the rest when I heard of it. I have grieved over those victims and have been broken hearted for their families. I have gone to God in prayer over them. However, I think the sting of it all was just a bit too deep for someone like me, and it brought me to a low place. With that and hormones involved, it just continued my spiral to a very low place.
With everything going on, and having the lack of sleep that most moms experience when they have a new baby in the house, your mind just plays nasty games with you on top of everything else one is going through at the time. You compile that with not getting a moment to sit and rest, it can just spell trouble in a ways. I had already been feeling that there, physically, was not enough of me to go around for all my kids and husband and such. (I have to say that some of those feelings have toned down a bit now.) Anyways, I started saying awful things about myself such as you are a terrible mom; you are a terrible wife; and worst of all, that I hated my life. Then I would spend more time thinking about how terrible of a person I was for thinking that way, especially just after having my fourth blessing--my fourth child... and hence my four children. I would battle these thoughts inside; but felt like I got no where except only to become all the more physically, emotionally, and spiritually exhausted. I also felt more alone and isolated.
Then to add to it all, I started to experience the worst postpartum hair loss ever; and when you couple that with everything else, I just felt so icky about myself. My hairstylist believes that hormones and stress caused the larger than normal postpartum hair loss. Last week, she helped me feel better about myself and showed me how to wear my hair accordingly after she gave me a new hairstyle to help and she told me some things I could do to help prevent further hair loss, and how to start allowing new hair to grow back hopefully. I felt a bit pampered that evening in some regards, and I left feeling better than I had been about myself in weeks.
That night, however, I had realized that an infant baby girl was losing her battle with a brain injury she received when she suffered severe oxygen loss when the placenta sadly ruptured. Through Facebook, I had found out about the baby early last week, and I was struck by her parents through it all. I, along with many, had been praying for a miracle--a miracle of healing. And as I realized that God's healing was going to be different than what we all were hoping and praying for, my heart began to break once again. I kept checking FB to see of any updates about the little baby. My sister, after observing this, pointed out that I had replaced the news with FB instead. And she was right. FB has a major doubled-edged sword. It is great to see some things and to hear other updates, but it sets you up to see other things that can fan the flames in other areas of your life so to speak. I told her through various social circles (even outside of the world of FB), I had heard and been praying for four children ranging from 1 and 1/2 years of age to an unborn baby. And two of those children had already gone to be with the their Heavenly Father while the other two looked like they would too meet healing in the arms of their Heavenly Father; and I told her, how I just wanted to hear of a miracle again. I told her that I wanted to feel the warm light in what seemed like a sea of darkness.
Well, I started to do what I saw the parents of the baby girl do on FB. They found thankfulness and blessings in everything they could and in almost every update they gave about their daughter, even when their daughter reached healing in her Lord's arms. I wanted to be like that again... I used to be but I had lost it! I had learned that when Skye was in the hospital to find joy and blessing in everything! It just had become complacent in my life for a bit. And so the next morning after I saw my hairstylist and my sis, I started thanking God in ALL things again! I am starting to feel joy again! I know that it has been a week's time, but I feel much better than where I had been. I started to look up and out of my pit again!
I have spent just about the last 7 days, praying and thanking God through out my whole day! I even thanked God for Big Mac's huge diaper explosion. Yep! I thanked God for my son's poop! There are people out there that would give almost anything to have their child with them. They want to have the experience of cleaning up the largest poop explosions as I had done the other day!
Thank the Lord for the toilet you are cleaning, because you have a family to clean up after. Thank the Lord for the car that broke down today, because at least you have a car to drive at all! Thank the Lord for your two-year-old's temper tan trims, because you are blessed to have your child in your life at all! Thank the Lord for the rain, snow, etc. If you are single, thank the Lord that you are at a time in your life that you are free to be you! Whatever it is, be thankful! Have a thankful heart in ALL things. Your pit at times is just that--a pit--you can make the choice to get out of it. When you start being thankful, you start realizing that God has been there all along and you can see the blessings; and joy can and will return!
I have made a few lifestyle changes as well. I don't watch the news. Actually, I have not watched the news for the last several weeks now, and I only watch one ten minute local blurb that includes morning traffic and weather. I watch less TV in general now too. I find my stomach turns with watching some of the crap and pettiness on television. I rather scrapbook and such than sit and watch junk. I have begun to limit how many times I get on FB too, and I guard myself in what I take the time to look at while on there. I have also chosen to post differently on FB as well for the time being. I may start taking my camera and snapping pics even more than I do already, and I may post some on my wall as well! I want people to catch the wave of a thankful and joyful spirit who relies on God even on a damp, cloudy, and cold day! I want people to start seeing the blessings and to start realizing that God doesn't want them to go it alone. Use His strength to move on through life and whatever trials may come!
This picture spoke to me when I started making some changes in my heart, and how I choose to approach things in my life.
Enter his gates with thanksigiving and his courts with praise; give thanks to him and praise his name. For the Lord is good and his love endures forever; his faithfulness continues through all generations. (Psalm 100:4-5)
(I am doing this in memory of MJ and the other children too!)
After all my previous pregnancies, you could find me crying while sitting in front of the television after hearing about a baby/child in some of kind of crisis. And I mean, I would weep over the children. I have always been empathetic and sensitive about how others are feeling through out my whole life; however, during the postpartum times in my life, they are heightened to the 10th degree just about. Scot helped me realize that the news and other such shows I should stay away from especially after just having a baby; and that has helped a great deal, but this time however, simply avoiding the news didn't help me for various reasons.
First, I was dealing with some of the hardest relationship issues that I have ever had to deal with to date. I was fearing of losing a relationship that was near and dear to me, while knowing at some point that another relationship had to go (for which that relationship recently did fall apart and almost exactly the way I thought that it would). During the highest point of turmoil and stress, I ended up losing about 15 pounds in just a matter of days. I think my body is still trying to adjust to that rapid and unexpected weight loss while nursing my infant. I was almost at an utter loss in the whole situation.
I do believe that the Sandy Hook tragedy was perhaps one of the largest catalyst for me and postpartum. I do admit that I did briefly have the news on that afternoon when the news broke of the heart-breaking tragedy. I had two bites of my lunch and could not eat the rest when I heard of it. I have grieved over those victims and have been broken hearted for their families. I have gone to God in prayer over them. However, I think the sting of it all was just a bit too deep for someone like me, and it brought me to a low place. With that and hormones involved, it just continued my spiral to a very low place.
With everything going on, and having the lack of sleep that most moms experience when they have a new baby in the house, your mind just plays nasty games with you on top of everything else one is going through at the time. You compile that with not getting a moment to sit and rest, it can just spell trouble in a ways. I had already been feeling that there, physically, was not enough of me to go around for all my kids and husband and such. (I have to say that some of those feelings have toned down a bit now.) Anyways, I started saying awful things about myself such as you are a terrible mom; you are a terrible wife; and worst of all, that I hated my life. Then I would spend more time thinking about how terrible of a person I was for thinking that way, especially just after having my fourth blessing--my fourth child... and hence my four children. I would battle these thoughts inside; but felt like I got no where except only to become all the more physically, emotionally, and spiritually exhausted. I also felt more alone and isolated.
Then to add to it all, I started to experience the worst postpartum hair loss ever; and when you couple that with everything else, I just felt so icky about myself. My hairstylist believes that hormones and stress caused the larger than normal postpartum hair loss. Last week, she helped me feel better about myself and showed me how to wear my hair accordingly after she gave me a new hairstyle to help and she told me some things I could do to help prevent further hair loss, and how to start allowing new hair to grow back hopefully. I felt a bit pampered that evening in some regards, and I left feeling better than I had been about myself in weeks.
That night, however, I had realized that an infant baby girl was losing her battle with a brain injury she received when she suffered severe oxygen loss when the placenta sadly ruptured. Through Facebook, I had found out about the baby early last week, and I was struck by her parents through it all. I, along with many, had been praying for a miracle--a miracle of healing. And as I realized that God's healing was going to be different than what we all were hoping and praying for, my heart began to break once again. I kept checking FB to see of any updates about the little baby. My sister, after observing this, pointed out that I had replaced the news with FB instead. And she was right. FB has a major doubled-edged sword. It is great to see some things and to hear other updates, but it sets you up to see other things that can fan the flames in other areas of your life so to speak. I told her through various social circles (even outside of the world of FB), I had heard and been praying for four children ranging from 1 and 1/2 years of age to an unborn baby. And two of those children had already gone to be with the their Heavenly Father while the other two looked like they would too meet healing in the arms of their Heavenly Father; and I told her, how I just wanted to hear of a miracle again. I told her that I wanted to feel the warm light in what seemed like a sea of darkness.
Well, I started to do what I saw the parents of the baby girl do on FB. They found thankfulness and blessings in everything they could and in almost every update they gave about their daughter, even when their daughter reached healing in her Lord's arms. I wanted to be like that again... I used to be but I had lost it! I had learned that when Skye was in the hospital to find joy and blessing in everything! It just had become complacent in my life for a bit. And so the next morning after I saw my hairstylist and my sis, I started thanking God in ALL things again! I am starting to feel joy again! I know that it has been a week's time, but I feel much better than where I had been. I started to look up and out of my pit again!
I have spent just about the last 7 days, praying and thanking God through out my whole day! I even thanked God for Big Mac's huge diaper explosion. Yep! I thanked God for my son's poop! There are people out there that would give almost anything to have their child with them. They want to have the experience of cleaning up the largest poop explosions as I had done the other day!
Thank the Lord for the toilet you are cleaning, because you have a family to clean up after. Thank the Lord for the car that broke down today, because at least you have a car to drive at all! Thank the Lord for your two-year-old's temper tan trims, because you are blessed to have your child in your life at all! Thank the Lord for the rain, snow, etc. If you are single, thank the Lord that you are at a time in your life that you are free to be you! Whatever it is, be thankful! Have a thankful heart in ALL things. Your pit at times is just that--a pit--you can make the choice to get out of it. When you start being thankful, you start realizing that God has been there all along and you can see the blessings; and joy can and will return!
I have made a few lifestyle changes as well. I don't watch the news. Actually, I have not watched the news for the last several weeks now, and I only watch one ten minute local blurb that includes morning traffic and weather. I watch less TV in general now too. I find my stomach turns with watching some of the crap and pettiness on television. I rather scrapbook and such than sit and watch junk. I have begun to limit how many times I get on FB too, and I guard myself in what I take the time to look at while on there. I have also chosen to post differently on FB as well for the time being. I may start taking my camera and snapping pics even more than I do already, and I may post some on my wall as well! I want people to catch the wave of a thankful and joyful spirit who relies on God even on a damp, cloudy, and cold day! I want people to start seeing the blessings and to start realizing that God doesn't want them to go it alone. Use His strength to move on through life and whatever trials may come!
This picture spoke to me when I started making some changes in my heart, and how I choose to approach things in my life.
Enter his gates with thanksigiving and his courts with praise; give thanks to him and praise his name. For the Lord is good and his love endures forever; his faithfulness continues through all generations. (Psalm 100:4-5)
(I am doing this in memory of MJ and the other children too!)
Friday, March 1, 2013
I Am SO Proud Of You!
Well, I mentioned several months ago that we were learning how to parent a child with anxieties. I mentioned how we have good days and bad days; good weeks and bad weeks; as well as good months and bad months; because it all just depends... depends on her and on life. We had a couple of good months, but we have had a few bad spells with in the last few weeks; and I thought that I would just write a quick blurb about our progress.
Luckily, she hasn't had too many episodes, but she has had a few just the same. Besides one time when Scot and I were not exactly on the same page with how to deal with her during one of her episodes, we have been a good team for the most part as we have helped her through some of her anxiety attacks. Her teacher has been awesome as well! We have set up a system and it is working well considering everything!
The last few attacks have had a variety of triggers, ranging anywhere from excitement over various birthday parties (which she did have quite a few that she attended with in the last few weeks); excitement about two separate field trips; a cold and a sore throat for which she admitted to me that she was afraid of coming down with pneumonia; to missing some school days; anxious about school work; and anxious tears and minor attack over a loose tooth. Yes, you read that correctly. We had some major drama beyond the normal realm of tooth drama over a loose tooth that in deed caused her to have a great deal of panic one evening that carried on to the next day.
When she is anxious about something regarding school, she seems to resort back to fears about the cafeteria. Over the last few episodes, Scot and I are believing that we are gaining some insight to the whole cafeteria meltdown, which she can have at least once a month. We are starting to believe that when she is anxious about something else and she is headed off to school, she uses her cafeteria fears as her go to place to relay to us about an anxiety. Only time will tell Scot and myself if our latest assumption is correct, because so often times these epsiodes are brought on by irrational thoughts and sometimes she refuses to share.
Anyways, with that said, as we all have been learning how to deal and to overcome, she is also realizing things too and I give her recognition for those times. On one particular day after she had experienced two episodes in one week, with one of those times being pretty bad that morning, I told her that she needed to find a way to push through all the fears and emotions to get through the day. She made it to school that morning as I was home wondering and worrying if the phone was going to ring with her school nurse or teacher being at the other end of the phone call at any given point of the day, especially when I knew that my little girl was also excited and nervous about some fun that she was going to have at a slumber party that evening. Each hour went by with out a phone call.
Finally, the end of the school day had come, and me and the boys were in the school pick-up line waiting for the girls to come to the van. With in a few minutes, Sky Baby and Crazy Paisy came over to the van and climbed in. Both girls were smiling. And the one daughter who I had been most concerned about that day proceeded to say to me, "I did what you said Mom. I pushed myself."
For which I replied, "I am SO proud of you!"
And then I saw her face light up with pride... And she deserved that moment!
Luckily, she hasn't had too many episodes, but she has had a few just the same. Besides one time when Scot and I were not exactly on the same page with how to deal with her during one of her episodes, we have been a good team for the most part as we have helped her through some of her anxiety attacks. Her teacher has been awesome as well! We have set up a system and it is working well considering everything!
The last few attacks have had a variety of triggers, ranging anywhere from excitement over various birthday parties (which she did have quite a few that she attended with in the last few weeks); excitement about two separate field trips; a cold and a sore throat for which she admitted to me that she was afraid of coming down with pneumonia; to missing some school days; anxious about school work; and anxious tears and minor attack over a loose tooth. Yes, you read that correctly. We had some major drama beyond the normal realm of tooth drama over a loose tooth that in deed caused her to have a great deal of panic one evening that carried on to the next day.
When she is anxious about something regarding school, she seems to resort back to fears about the cafeteria. Over the last few episodes, Scot and I are believing that we are gaining some insight to the whole cafeteria meltdown, which she can have at least once a month. We are starting to believe that when she is anxious about something else and she is headed off to school, she uses her cafeteria fears as her go to place to relay to us about an anxiety. Only time will tell Scot and myself if our latest assumption is correct, because so often times these epsiodes are brought on by irrational thoughts and sometimes she refuses to share.
Anyways, with that said, as we all have been learning how to deal and to overcome, she is also realizing things too and I give her recognition for those times. On one particular day after she had experienced two episodes in one week, with one of those times being pretty bad that morning, I told her that she needed to find a way to push through all the fears and emotions to get through the day. She made it to school that morning as I was home wondering and worrying if the phone was going to ring with her school nurse or teacher being at the other end of the phone call at any given point of the day, especially when I knew that my little girl was also excited and nervous about some fun that she was going to have at a slumber party that evening. Each hour went by with out a phone call.
Finally, the end of the school day had come, and me and the boys were in the school pick-up line waiting for the girls to come to the van. With in a few minutes, Sky Baby and Crazy Paisy came over to the van and climbed in. Both girls were smiling. And the one daughter who I had been most concerned about that day proceeded to say to me, "I did what you said Mom. I pushed myself."
For which I replied, "I am SO proud of you!"
And then I saw her face light up with pride... And she deserved that moment!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)