A Little Nugget

I have been experiencing some anxious thoughts lately. And as many of you know, I am not the most patient person in the world. Patience is not a strong virtue of mine, especially when it comes to waiting for something that I really want or such. When you couple anxiety with a lack of patience, it can be a little overwhelming for me.

Yesterday, as I was out and about on a mission with Paisley and Ian, to get Little Man's invites for his 1st birthday party coming up, an anxious thought just suddenly overcame me and my mind. It was the kind of moment where my heart felt like it was going to beat out of my chest and my stomach did a complete butterfly flutter as the thought quickly entered my mind.

I was completely caught off guard by the moment and how my body and emotions reacted to it. I had to talk myself through it and I began praying. Although this process was interrupted often by my little miss chatter-box behind me as Paisley is a talker. However, she kept talking about what princess she wanted or wanted to be. But I kept brushing her words aside as I was quickly trying to evaluate my thoughts.

There is something in my future, months a way from now, that I have no control over, but I am excited about its arrival time and the unknowns too--all at the same time. Some of the what-ifs and doubts surrounding it, however, are what sparked my episode that I had currently found myself in yesterday afternoon.

As we arrived to our destination and began the quick hunt for the invites, I finally realized what Paisley was talking about. As we walked through the aisles, Paisley was pointing out party stuff and princesses. She was talking about her party and what princess theme she wanted it to be. I kept telling her that we were here for Ian's day and that her birthday was still a ways a way. As we found our wanted items, we journeyed to the front of the store where Paisley proceeded to keep talking about her party and desires. I kept telling her that her birthday will come soon. But that she would have to wait. Her face started to show her distress as she realized how long she would have to wait. And in her true mother's fashion, the excitement and impatience was becoming too much for her to handle.

Seeing her face, I looked down at her and said, "I know that you are excited. You can wait. It will be here before you will know it." And with that she began to relax. As did I, as I realized that what I said to her and the timing of her concern was perfect in regards to my anxieties that I was experiencing. It was a little "nugget" of calming thoughts from God. As I spoke to Paisley, God spoke to me. He used her moment to get through to me. And my heart began to settle some. God knows me more then I realize. He is there to guide me through my life and my human nature and sinful tendencies. I am blessed.